


Smitten Kitten

by vampire_angel_z



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Beating, Demons, Disturbing Themes, Dubious Consent, M/M, Oral Sex, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slash, Slavery, Swearing, Violence, mention of suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-29
Updated: 2016-02-01
Packaged: 2018-05-03 22:13:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5309009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vampire_angel_z/pseuds/vampire_angel_z
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Niall has ruined Louis' life again. (Harry is Louis' demon roommate)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Please read carefully. Pay attention to tags. Mental health is the most important. No one has permission to post my stuff anywhere. Only I do. It is my work and I own it. Thank you.

“What the hell is this?” Louis hisses on the phone.

“Merry Christmas buddy boy,” Niall’s voice sounds delighted on the phone. “Love you, wanker.”

“You are going to die a painful, extreme death.”

“Why are you like this?” Niall sounds hurt.

“What is in the box?” Louis sounds angry. Not his usual always kind of angry, like super angry. Pissed off angry.

“Open it slut face.” Niall laughs. How can a laugh be Irish? “It’s Christmas fucking eve.”

Louis stares at the big red bow on the box with deep suspicion with his eyes. “I won’t.”

“And why is that?” Niall giggles. Fucking giggles because he's started already and he will go hard until New Years.

Irish Livers are iron livers.

“Because you are a bastard, and the last time I trusted you I woke up in Vegas,” Louis sobs with emotional agony, “Naked and chained to a hooker.”

“But the hooker was pretty.”

“The hooker was pretty.” Louis agrees. “Stay out of my fucking life.”

“Wait what I got for you this time Tommo,” Niall groans over the phone, “Almost kept him for me damn self.”

“Him,” Louis seethes, “For the last fucking time, I am not gay. And…” He gives the giant box in his living room a scared look, “There’s a person in there?”

“Well,” Niall sounds sheepish on the phone, “Can they even be called people?”

“Shit,” Louis sobs, “What did you do? Fucking hell. Oh, Jesus.”

“You are welcome,” Niall sing songs before the line cuts off and Louis rushes toward the garishly decorated box because Jesus fucking Christ there is a person suffocating in there!!!

\----------

“You sent me a demon.” Louis screams in Niall’s answering machine because the fucker won’t pick up his phone. “You asshole. What is the matter with you?”

Even without the tail and the furry ears that thing isn’t human. It’s too damn beautiful. It purrs at Louis and cocks its head to the side when he yells.

Oh and it’s naked.

Louis blushes and he won’t look at the beautiful boy’s tattoos (sigils most likely, to keep him docile and in a constant state of subservience and sexual service) and his abs and oh, his cock. Oh no, if Louis wasn’t gay before, this is the universe’s way to get him all rainbowed up.

“You know what?” Louis tells the thing, who is staring with breathtaking green eyes and Louis’ heterosexuality is dying a slow, painful death. “Let’s get you some clothes.” Louis laughs. “My clothes will not fit you.”

Boy stares blankly.

“Do you speak a human language?” Louis asks. “Oh lord I can’t.” He sits down on the floor and cries a little because of course this is happening to him.

“Get it together,” Louis says to himself because he is being ridiculous. He needs to be a man about this. He finds enough strength to run to his bedroom and return with a sheet and manages to cover beautiful boy with said sheet.

“Nice,” Louis smiles at lovely boy, who smiles back and, of course, there are dimples. Wonderful. “Look at you all covered up.”

Cat ears twitch, extremely sensitive to Louis’ every movement and sound.

“Listen kitty,” Louis says sternly and said feline obeys, paying full attention even when he can’t understand a damn word of English, “You are going back tomorrow morning.”

More purring, deep in the boy’s chest and is that a fucking butterfly? What even?

Louis starts to walk away and yelps when his wrist is grabbed, not by paws, but by a furry tail. “Yes?” He asks the creature. “May I help you?”

“Thirsty,” Boy rasps and Louis jumps several feet in the air.

“You can’t speak English!” Louis exclaims accusingly, as beautiful feline gives him a pleading look.

“Please,” Cat demon begs, “I need it.”

“Hey,” Louis feels the unexplainable need to comfort and protect beautiful cat. “Kitty,” He says, all loving. “I will get you some water,” At this point he would buy the most expensive spring water with all his life savings.

Fucking demons and their pheromones.

“Don’t go,” Kitty cat begs, when Louis starts to make it toward the kitchen, the tail’s grip tight around Louis’ wrist.

“Hey,” Louis’ instincts are on fire, “Kitty, I will be back with water. Okay? Don’t worry,” He soothes. He met this boy like fifteen minutes ago, already had an existential crisis, and is ready to fight for his beautiful inhuman ass. This is fucking stupid.

“I’m sorry,” That said, cat curls up on himself and gets all melancholy, feeling all sorry for himself. Louis is left standing beside him, with a glass of water, wondering which mistake has led him to this point. Not stabbing Niall Horan freshman year is number one of course.

\----------

“This is management, how can we help you?”

It says something about a business when its open Christmas.

“Umm,” Louis was expecting to get a machine and is not ready to speak to a person, let alone a perky, happy one. After all, Christmas is supposed to be a despondent time for everyone. “I am Louis Tomlinson, and I want to return my cat demon.”

“Oh, I am so sorry to hear you weren’t pleased with the services provided. Can you be more specific?”

“I don’t want to own a person?”

“A person?” The woman on the other end pauses, “Sir, demons are not people. Especially these ones. We manufacture them especially to cater to your needs.”

“What?” Louis snaps, “How is that possible? You don’t even know me?”

“Pardon me, sir,” The woman apologizes repeatedly, “But a Mr. Niall Horan…”

“Oh, he will be listed on my murder trial. Go on.”

The woman laughs nervously, “He commissioned a demon to be created for you?” She says uncertainly. “He described you, and your preferences and picked what you like? Did He claim to be a friend of yours? Is this not true? We take these kinds of pranks very seriously. These can be cause for legal issues.”

“No,” Louis grumbles, annoyed. “Don’t sue the asshole. I just want to return the demon, maybe even free him.” He looks to where the cat is still curled up in a corner, mewling pathetically.

“Sir, Mr. Horan paid a lot of money to have him created specifically for you. If you return him we would have to put him down.”

“Excuse me?” Louis cannot believe his ears. How heartless can management be?

“Well, we provide those kinds of services for owners who are tired of their demons and the services they provide, whether of a sexual or platonic nature. Our fees are nominal.”

“He is a person.” Louis snaps.

“True-born demons are considered persons under the law,” The lady starts to cite regulations; “Manufactured demons are property. Objects.”

“I can’t believe I am hearing this,” Louis says, disgusted. “You sick bitches. I am going to free him.”

“Sir if you free an artificial demon loose in the city he will be captured and put down. True borns have the mental control required to not harm humans. Fake demons could really hurt us.”

“That thing?” Louis looks to where cat boy is watching the falling snow. “It’s harmless.”

“It’s a demon. He is capable of a lot of damage.”

“Well,” Louis sighs, “I am not going to own a person. I don’t have that in me.”

“Well, in that case, euthanizing a demon is an easy process…”

“Will you shut the fuck up?” Louis grumbles, his heart hurting. “Why do I have to own him?”

“He was created with your signature in mind. A Mr. Niall Horan…”

“May he rest in peace…”

“Gave us a vial of your blood and a signed consent form from you, stating that we have your permission to soul bond a demon to you.”

“I hate you,” Louis tells the woman.

“Mr. Tomlinson, we take these kind of cases seriously, please help us get justice for you.”

“Oh god, no I will get my own fucking justice.” Louis will bury the cunt for forging his signature.

“If you do decide to keep your demon, make sure you come in to have him registered and get your information package. Attend the seminar. They can be quite helpful.”

Louis hangs up on psycho management and turns to his new friend, who gives him a sad look. “I did everything I could, but it looks like you are stuck with me buddy.”

“Thirsty,” Kitty begs.

“Then drink your water,” Louis offers again, “Come on buddy. Just drink.”

“Please,” The ears twitch neurotically. “I’m sorry.”

Louis sighs and calls his family. Merry fucking Christmas to everyone.


	2. Chapter 2

“I will give you ten thousand dollars if you tell me where he is.”

“No can do Louis,” Liam says over the phone, “You will break his legs.”

“You sound happy,” Louis says accusingly, “You sound happy and content.”

“Yeah, my family loves Sophia so much.” Liam giggles, fucking giggles, the goon. “They love her so much. Jesus.” Celebrating Christmas with his family and his girlfriend.

The sick freak.

“Jesus to you too. Niall’s whereabouts. Please.”

“I don’t think so.” Liam tsks disapprovingly. “You will break his legs. With his own golf clubs.”

“Is he playing golf?”

“No.” Liam says quickly, but it’s too late. The game’s afoot.

“That cunt loves drunken golf.” Louis laughs. “Thanks, Lee. Say hi to your woman for me.”

“Please, don’t tell Niall…”

“That you told me where he is?” Louis throws his coat on with one hand, “Oh fuck yes. It will make my revenge sweeter.”

“For god’s sake Louis,” Liam begs but still sounds so fucking happy, “It’s Christmas.”

“Jesus would approve,” Louis says and hangs up. “Okay, kitty,” He turns to his friend who is sad and rejected in his corner of sheets and pillows. “Louis will be back soon.”

“Thirsty,” Is all he mews.

\----------

“Oh crap,” Niall laughs uproariously when he sees Louis run across the golf course but makes no move to run away because this can only be a congratulatory hug for how amazing the cat demon sex was. “Oh, sweet baby Jesus in a manger.” He moans when his lucky golf club is snatched and used to beat him viciously.

“You faked my signature?” Louis screams in between beatings, “You stole my blood? How did you even do that? You piece of shit.”

As Nialler curls up into the fetal position, others watch in amusement. No one asks any questions because, Niall Horan is explanation enough.

“Julian,” Niall croaks as Louis gets him in the right side and that’s where the fucking liver is, his most precious resource, how he processes alcohol. “Help, buddy.”

“Oh hell no,” Said friend, and possible love interest (rumors fly like pigeons) giggles, everyone is super drunk, “I ain’t messing with that thing.” He shudders as Louis drops the club.

“Don’t fuck with me,” Louis threatens and rushes back toward the wall he climbed on to get in here.

“Security,” Niall rasps before he blacks out.

Julian doubles over laughing because this is so funny and he’s a little high. Somebody should probably call an ambulance. Whatever.

\----------

“Okay, I’m back,” Louis huffs as he rushes back inside. “I hate snow,” He declares at the cat who looks proper depressed.

“You know what,” He tells the feline, “I have to live with me, so it’s probably good that it’s somebody else’s punishment too.” His eyes soften at the desolate looking cat, “No, aww hell. Nobody deserves this fate, I’m sorry kitty.”

“Thirsty,” Cat declares for the thousandth time and Louis needs to handle the situation.

“Okay sweetie,” Louis coos at the sad creatures, “This is water,” He pours a fresh bowl of bottled water and brings it over to his guest, “This takes care of the thirst.”

Harry watches Louis demonstrate the drinking and then obediently drinks the whole bowl.

“Good kitten,” Louis blurts out and then blushes because kitten is something one calls a sexy girl during intercourse, as she reveals herself from her sexy nightie. Her pussy wet and tight, not a grown man all tatted up, rock hard abs, even harder cock always ready to please. An inhuman ready to devour Louis in every way.

“Thirsty.”

“Oh, stupid kitten,” Louis scolds and oh hell. He can’t stop calling man cat an endearing term. Not that the said feline minds, he’s purring happily.

“Please,” Kitty begs, his ears and tail out of control, “Just let me have some.”

“Some what?” Louis snaps, “Do you want vodka? Because if Niall had you made a drunk like him I will kill you myself.”

Before Harry has a chance to answer, Louis’ computer chimes and he runs to it. “Oh,” he sighs, “There’s a date available tomorrow,” He makes a happy sound, “We can have you registered, maybe even figure out what this thirsty crap is about. I am so worried about you.” Louis feels so scared. It’s bad enough he’s a mess, he will not ruin this poor kitten’s life. _There I go again_ , He blushes angrily, _calling this man a kitten. Shame on me_.

Kitty purrs and thrashes his tail around happily.

\----------

“Welcome to Modest Management,” A representative greets Louis at the door as he manages to herd kitty inside the giant glass building. Most cunts are busy shopping, but there’s a sizeable crowd still present.

“I cannot with you right now.” Louis says to the cheerful woman as kitty whimpers and wraps his tail around Louis’ waist. He is very scared.

Louis managed to put his cat in a robe and tape several sheets to him since there is nothing in Louis’ wardrobe which will fit. It still looks beautiful, like some kind of Adonis. Cunts are leering at him. Louis holds his kitty close. He doesn’t want his boy getting molested by some pervert. Most of these people are rich old geezers, ancient businessmen, and women, powerful enough to afford such demonic luxuries.

There is apparently some kind of Boxing Day sale going on. Louis is maybe the only person here to get his information package. Everyone else is here to get their demon.

The saleslady doesn’t even have to do much selling. One look at Louis’ kitty and everyone is ready to throw their money at management and get their own demon.

“Before I get started,” Barbie doll looking woman smiles pleasantly, “Are there any questions?”

Several hands rise in the air. One extremely elderly looking gent turns to where Louis is standing protectively in front of kitty. “Where can I get that model?”

Louis hisses, angry. Kitty whimpers, thinking he has done something to displease his master. Louis brushes his hands through the tail wrapped around his waist, massaging it soothingly.

“The model depends on you,” The representative says, diplomatically, “Everyone’s demon will be different and difficult to predict.”

A middle-aged woman deflates, “My demon won’t look like him?” She sighs sadly at kitty cat, who licks the back of his hand, purring.

“You can choose to have a cat demon,” Representative is feeling a little worried now, “Gender is also up to you. Looks are unpredictable.”

“So basically,” A man looking to have a mid-life crisis, groans, “I have to look like him,” He glares at Louis, who glares back just as hard, “To have a pretty demon.”

“Your demons will be attractive,” management is surprisingly honest for such a soulless organization, “How attractive varies.” They clearly had to deal with lawsuits in the past and have started being more truthful with their clients.

“Nick Grimshaw,” A fellow offers Louis his hand and takes it right back when rejected, “I will pay you a billion dollars for this cat.”

“Declined,” Louis already hates himself enough. He will protect this innocent kitten until he dies.

“Do you even know what a billion dollars can buy you?” Grimshaw huffs.

“Not my kitten,” Louis smirks and then frowns because again with the kitten?

Nick apparently also catches the verbal slip. “Okay, getting emotionally invested with these things is a bad idea.”

“He is a person.”

Nick rolls his eyes. “He is a fucking demon and you can get like 10 more with that kind of money.”

“Jeez,” Louis glares, “How expensive is this place?”

“You paid for him,” Nick shakes his head, “You should know. God how rich is your dad?”

“My father is a cunt,” Louis answers and blows a raspberry when Nick flips him the bird.

“Good kitten,” Louis coos when Harry learns the rude gestures and starts showing people the finger.

\----------

“So your name is Harry Styles.” Louis shakes his head, “What the hell kind of name is Styles?”

Harry purrs. He does that a lot. It’s cute.

“I have been given an allowance for your clothes,” Louis learns from the file he’s been given, “Good. I have Niall’s credit card number so we have extra coverage.” He assures Harry who giggles.

“Your tattoos are keeping you in control,” Louis reads, “If I want you to show your personality more I have to get tattoos, what kind of psycho logic?”

“You will bond more with your demon,” A melodious voice explains, “As your bond deepens his soul has more freedom to express itself.”

“Umm,” Louis gives the angelic looking being a look, “What the fuck are you.”

“What do I look like?” The thing smirks in amusement when Harry growls and covers Louis protectively with his body. “I won’t take him from you. He’s a baby,” Angel explains. “He’s worried I’m trying to steal you.”

“Are you with one of these old cunts because that would be tragic?” Louis makes a face.

“I’m a true born. I have no owner. My name is Zayn.”

“That’s scary.” Louis takes the offered hand. He would rather fraternize with demons than Nick Grimshaw. It says something about him.

“My number,” Zayn offers to text Louis who begrudgingly accepts, “If you need help with him.”

“Fine,” Louis groans. “Only because I care about him and want to keep him healthy.”

“Then you are the only one here,” Zayn says and gestures to a young half-mouse half-humanoid on the floor, fully naked, his body covered with welts, his owner nonchalant about his care, dragging his half-awake corpse along with him wherever she goes.

“That’s fucking nasty.” Louis feels sick.

“That’s life, unfortunately, this one,” Zayn smiles at Harry, who whimpers when sick owner of half-mouse walks by, “Is quite lucky.”

“He’s a slave,” Louis barks like a dog when anyone looks at Harry, scaring both competition and Harry simultaneously, “His life sucks.”

“It could be worse.” Zayn says and walks away. His aura of power and money.

Harry looks and feels much more relaxed when Zayn is gone. Less jealous of imaginary competition.

“Oh yes,” Louis says sarcastically to his demon friend, “Like I want another demon in my life, you are enough of a recipe for a coronary episode.”

“Thirsty.” Kitty mews.

“Oh yes,” Louis quickly turns the alphabetized booklet and makes it toward hydration because god forbid his expensive kitten dies of thirst in his care.

“Oh no.” Louis gapes in horror. “Oh no, over my fucking dead body.”

“Drink please,” Harry begs. “Need it.”

Louis quickly makes his way to a sales representative who looks pretty pleased. She has sold quite a lot of units. “He needs my semen to stay hydrated and live?”

“Oh yes,” Shameless woman nods without even blinking, “This particular demon was created for sexual pleasure. He can only survive on your semen.”

“I will burn this building down!”

“Mr. Tomlinson,” The woman says because Louis is now well-known around these parts. “This is a beautiful unit. Please be happy and make do with what you have.”

“This is abuse.” Louis screams. “I won’t do this.”

“I will,” Grimshaw immediately steps in like the gallant warrior he is. “Let me.”

“I will stab you, disgusting freak.” Louis hisses. “Pig.”

“Oink oink.” Nick winks at Harry who wraps his tail around Louis. “Piggy likes.”

“Fuck off.” Louis shrieks like a wraith, scaring all humans and demons in the immediate vicinity.

“Thirsty,” Harry whimpers and a nearby woman winces in sympathy.

“What kind of a monster are you?” She tells Louis who gaps at her chained demon at her feet. “Why won’t you feed him?”

“I’m the monster?” Louis bellows as Harry begs him for drink.

“Eat lots of fruits,” Louis is advised, “Semen will taste good for your demon.”

“I will kill myself,” Louis tells Harry who pouts, “You will be orphaned.”

“You are a terrible master.” The woman who has been abusing and lashing her mouse demon informs Louis. “Starving a demon is sick business.”

“Fuck you lady.” Louis sticks his tongue out at her.

“Fine,” Woman smirks and hands Louis her business card.

“Please,” Harry begs, “Drink.”

 


	3. Chapter 3

“Okay kitten,” Louis says and makes a face at himself, “Feel free to you know,” He snaps at his cat, “Stop me from calling you this appalling term.”

“I like it,” Harry says simply. “I am your kitten.” He drawls.

“You stupid cat.” Louis screams, “You have ruined my life.”

“Okay,” A young man, all of twelve, with a bear of a demon, with a ball gag on, shakes his head at Louis, “I am reporting you for abuse.”

“Fuck you cunt,” Louis says hysterically. “Fuck you and your family.”

“Sure,” The boy’s mother, with her own demon, passes Louis a card, which he throws back at her, annoyed.

“I like that one,” Harry gestures to the most expensive store because of course expensive cat has expensive taste. “I like those shoes.”

“I will see what I can do.” Louis turns his nose up but is forced to follow because kitty is scurrying into the Yves Saint Laurent display.

“I also want that one,” Kitty says when he’s maxed out Niall’s card. “I like that coat.”

“Yeah sure, why not.” Louis is feeling awfully guilty about poor cat’s awful life. Givenchy this, Gucci that, whatever brand cat wants he gets.

“You are spoiling him way too much,” Grimshaw scoffs as he walks by, with a cat of his own which looks awfully familiar.

It could be Harry’s brother.

“You fucking copycat.” Louis curses up a storm. “You cunt-munching whore.”

“You like?” Nick giggles and makes his kitty twirl, “Meet Henry.”

“Oh, I will slit your throat.” Louis threatens. “You slut.”

Harry pouts and hugs Louis close. He has been extremely possessive all day. What if another demon makes off with his human?

“What the fuck is that?” Louis gestures to Grimshaw’s cat which has curly hair, green eyes, the whole works.

“I know!” Nick huffs, “Where are the dimples? I want a refund.”

“You sick freak.” Louis’ face is red. A sick inner part of him is proud Nick’s kitty is not as pretty and perfect as his kitten that is and forever will be the most beautiful demon in all the land.

Louis hates himself more than anyone.

“Why are you buying him all those clothes?” Nick scoffs, “He’s going to be naked most of the time anyway.”

“He won’t be!” Louis snaps.

“I won’t?” Harry makes a miserable sound.

“You shut up.” Louis snaps at Harry, “Look,” He nudges the cat toward another glittering shop, “More of that expensive crap you like.”

Harry whimpers and curls up at Louis’ feet. He won’t leave his master alone with Henry.

“I see what it is.” Nick laughs, “Performance issues?” He gives Louis’ crotch a meaningful look.

“I do not have any issues,” Louis hisses. Harry hisses back playfully.

“I can help with the issues,” Nick winks, “You, me and your kitty. Henry here can record.”

“I will bathe in your blood,” Louis warns Nick who skips off, Henry shadowing him.

“I won’t share you,” Harry warns. “I don’t care if you have me killed.”

“You dumb cat.” Louis smacks his forehead. “Now are you done for the day or do we need to buy you more perfume or some shit?”

“Aren’t you going to enter the contest?” Louis is asked by the owner of a fox demon. “You will win. Your cat is freaking gorgeous.”

“Enough.” Louis snaps at everyone. “My kitty has had enough trauma for today.”

“He looks fine to me.” Someone from management comments at Harry who giggles and shows Louis his new scarf.

“If I stay here another minute I will slaughter you all.” Louis screams and grabs his cat. “Let’s go, Harry.”

“Why won’t you call me kitten?” Harry asks mournfully as he’s dragged out with his ten different shopping bags.

“What a beautiful cat with such a nasty owner.” Louis hears just before he exits.

\----------

Harry collapses on Louis’ couch as soon as they return, and that’s when Louis’ reminded of the whole dehydration issue.

“Okay,” Louis blushes and prays for his sanity. “I am going to be back with your… drink.”

“What?” Harry makes a confused face.

Louis grabs a china bowl (with cute cats which he bought for Harry), “I am going to get you some… food.”

“Oh,” Harry grabs Louis’ waist and Jesus that’s some strength. “I can get it straight from the source.” He starts to grab Louis’ crotch and that’s when Louis makes a run toward his bedroom.

“Be back in a minute.” He ignores Harry’s hurt look and locks himself in.

He pointedly doesn’t think of a certain cat demon when he comes.

\----------

Louis tries not to think about the positive affect his cum has on Harry’s health. The cat is glowing and healthy and happier and it’s just not right.

None of this is right.

“Do you like this one?” Harry models another one of his shirts for Louis, just his shirt, nothing else and this has to be some kind of porn fantasy. It has to be. “It matches your eyes.”

“I don’t think there’s anything you can wear you won’t look good in,” Louis explains to the kitty. “You are beautiful.”

“Okay,” Harry shrugs and leaps on Louis’ lap, demanding to be pet. “If you say so.”

“Yes Harry,” Louis whimpers because the cat doesn’t have any bottoms on and it’s just not fair. “You are lovely. We have established that.”

“Hmm,” Harry sighs, “You don’t want me here, do you?”

“Harry,” Louis looks up at his ceiling, and sighs, “Babe.”

“I didn’t ask to be here,” Harry stares into Louis’ eyes, pupils slit and then round. Switching, alternating. “I didn’t ask to be created.”

“I know, babe.” Louis smiles, tense, “I’m just trying to make this easy on you.”

“I realize this is an imposition,” Harry drawls, “On your life, in your space.”

“You are one intelligent kitty.” Louis grumbles. “But the imposition goes both ways, Harry.”

“Call me kitten,” Harry growls.

“Look,” Louis grabs muscular biceps, “You have rights here. You don’t have to be some kind of sex slave. You are my friend.”

“Friends with benefits?” Harry’s hand finds its way to Louis’ crotch.

“I won’t abuse my power over you, Harry.” Louis gently grabs the paw off his crotch and takes it aside. “I’m not that type of person.”

“Maybe I will abuse my power over you,” Harry smirks, “I’m like a hundred times stronger. What’s stopping me from taking you to your bedroom and fucking you?”

“You are not that kind of kitten,” Louis scoffs. “You are a good kitten.” He cannot doubt his cat’s purity.

“You bought me for sex,” Harry’s dimples are so wonderfully perfectly angelic. “Who will question it? Even when you have me put down.”

“I could never hurt my cat.” Louis shudders at the very thought.

“You are unbelievable.” Harry huffs and the muscular weight is off Louis and he’s all alone and what happened?

“I am trying to be honorable here.”

“Fuck your honor.” Harry calls out and slams the bedroom door shut.

\----------

“He hates me,” Louis sobs in his phone, sitting on the hallway floor, “He hates me so much.”

“Please explain what happened.” Zayn’s voice is unfairly beautiful, like caramel or some shit.

“I won’t have sex with him and he got mad.”

“Oh.” Zayn sounds perplexed.

“Oh?” Louis sobs even harder, “What the hell?” His life is such a mess. Holiday season should be easy because he’s mostly avoiding his family. Why is this happening?

There is yet another person in Louis’ life he has managed to disappoint and he’s known Harry less than a week. Why lord Jesus why?

“Usually demons are the ones who don’t want sex,” Zayn explains, “And I get calls from customers trying to understand what they have done wrong.”

“What is your job exactly?”

“I work with Modest management,” Zayn says, honest and unashamed. “I help new customers get better acquainted with their demons if they so wish.”

“You work with that nasty organization?” Louis sounds so judgy and it’s not right.

None of this is right.

“Yeah,” Zayn doesn’t sound upset which is good because being a true born his powers must be ridiculously advanced. He can really hurt Louis if he so wishes. “It’s the only way I can make a difference in those poor slaves’ lives.”

“Oh god I am a sick pervert and I own a poor demon and I am taking advantage of him.” Louis makes a ghastly noise which has Zayn wincing on the other end.

“You sound like a decent human being, Louis,” Zayn sounds surprised these words are coming out of his mouth.

“I am not going to molest that cat.” Louis snaps.

“Mostly I get calls because a demon is young and beautiful and not into their much older human counterpart and the human’s trying to get them to put out. A lot of times the demon won’t drink their human’s semen.”

“That part is disgusting,” Louis screams in the phone.

“Okay,” Zayn says, his voice pained, “My ears are like a thousand times more sensitive than yours.”

“Sorry.” Louis sniffles. His emotional crisis is in full swing.

“This is honestly the first time somebody has called me and complained that their demon is being too loving. Most people want sex and physical contact.”

“Perverts all of them.”

“Well,” Zayn seems kind of flabbergasted at Louis’ general attitude, well too bad, he’s Louis’ only fucking hope. “You seem to have the opposite problem of what I usually deal with.”

“You help people rape their demons?”

“Excuse me?”

“You sick angel looking freak.”

“I help people make connections, the kind you have already made with Harry.” Zayn sounds annoyed, “To help them see that their demons are people. Not many of them start out buying their slaves expensive clothes and warding off sexual attempts. Like I said this is the opposite of a problem.”

“Help me, please.” Louis sounds so pathetic, Zayn takes pity on him.

“You need to have a conversation with the cat.”

“He will try to have sex with me again.”

“He’s a person,” Zayn reminds Louis. “You know that. You treat him better than he thinks he deserves to be treated. Keep treating him like a king and establish boundaries.”

“That’s actually helpful.” Louis sounds deeply surprised.

“I help demons, Louis.” Zayn huffs and hangs up.

“Beautiful cunt.” Louis pouts at his phone.

\----------

“I don’t like you,” Harry repeats for the twentieth time, perched on the edge of what’s become his sofa. He’s a very territorial cat. “You are a bad master.”

“I am not your master.” Louis gently reminds the beautiful monstrosity. “I am your friend.”

“Oh, why don’t you just perform an exorcism on me?” Harry is deeply irritated.

“I respect you.” Louis glares daggers at what is probably going to be listed as his cause of death which is ridiculous because it was supposed to be Niall fucking Horan.

Niall sent Harry, so it’s kind of still Niall?

“What?” Harry looks confused.

“And if you hate me for it,” Louis looks ready to cry, “Then fuck it. Hate me you freak of nature. Hate me and condemn me.”

“I don’t understand.” Harry makes a face, his dimples on full display.

“I will not take advantage of some cat.” Louis rubs his eyes furiously, “I won’t hurt someone weaker than me.”

“I can crush you and break you,” Harry reminds Louis.

“I am a good person.” Louis wanted to handle this like a mature person. Fuck it, a teenage, pathetic little boy it is. “I have values, which shall not be compromised.”

“Okay?” Harry looks concerned.

“You are going to live with dignity whether you like it or not.” Louis sounds threatening.

“You are a bad master.” Harry pouts.

“So they tell me.” Louis stands his ground. No super pretty cat is going to fuck with him.

“I’m going to bed.” Harry sounds tired of Louis’ shit.

“Bye,” Louis says, annoyed when kitty saunters off toward Louis’ bedroom. “That’s _my_ room, cat.”

“My name is kitten!”

 

 

 

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

“If you won’t then I will,” Niall threatens for the twentieth time. “I will fornicate with the cat.”

“No one will do anything.” Louis snaps.

“I am in a committed relationship, Louis,” Liam laughs a little. “No sexy cat is going to change my mind.”

“So you admit he’s sexy,” Niall leans back in his chair, looking disgustingly like a Bond villain.

“He’s okay looking.” Liam shrugs uncomfortably. He won’t admit to shit.

“Y’all stay away from my cat.” Louis waves a spatula threateningly.

“I am just going to borrow him.” Niall says soothingly. “Don’t forget who bought him for you. Your sugar baby Niall.”

“You have ruined my life.” Louis screams.

“You say that so much it’s lost all meaning.” Niall scoffs.

“Niall,” Liam chastises, “You should have cleared it with Louis before making such a permanent purchase, and to take the guy’s blood?”

“Oh does daddy want something nice?” Niall winks at Liam. “Baby got lots of change left.”

“Being a sugar baby means people buy _you_ things,” Liam explains patiently.

“Where did you even get this kind of money, cunt?” Louis hollers angrily.

“Baby is rich.” Niall giggles, “All the more reason to be nice to him.”

“Speaking in third person doesn’t make us worry about you less.” Liam says, squinting.

Harry pouts, sauntering in from where he was lounging in the balcony. Niall and Liam lean forward expectantly. “Louis, I’m horny.”

“Go jack off.”

“I want you,” Harry begs, “Please master.”

“Okay I am right here,” Niall offers, and from the looks on Liam’s face, the modest diamond ring he gave Sophia is the only thing keeping him from offering himself.

“Don’t want you,” Harry says kindly, “But you seem nice.”

“Thank you,” Niall seems genuinely complimented. “I needed that.”

“I am going to tie you up,” Louis threatens Harry.

“Okay,” Harry says readily.

“That sounds great, sign me up,” Niall says, eager.

Liam is silent. Silence protects. Louis and Niall are bad enough for his fragile heterosexuality. This cat thing is dangerous.

“Can I have a drink?” Harry asks nonchalantly.

“You may not.” Louis says, his face ready to explode with shameful blush. “You had one this morning.” He knows exactly how much nutrition a demon Harry’s age and size needs. Anything else is just… treats.

“Oh yum yum,” Niall winks, knowing exactly what drink is.

“What’s a drink?” Liam asks, confused. He’s blissfully unaware of sex demon culture.

“Open your mouths and die,” Louis says to Niall and Harry, before either male has a chance to explain to ridiculously innocent daddy Liam. “It’s bad enough I know.”

“You know what,” Liam makes a fearful sound, “I don’t need to know.”

“You do not,” Louis makes a thunderous sound.

“Can I…” Niall says, his tone lewd, “Supply the drink?”

“Over my dead body.” Louis says, his tone sugary and poisonous at the same time.

“No it has to be master.” Harry says, pouting.

“Your master can go to hell,” Louis snaps at Harry.

“Why are you saying that?” Harry says, his eyes a little teary.

“I’m sorry,” Louis finds himself apologizing immediately. “That was uncalled for.”

“Damn,” Liam and Niall say together, surprised at how easily the cat has tamed fiery Louis.

“Shut up,” Louis yells and waves a spatula at his guests.

“You have no manners,” Niall sounds deeply hurt despite having zero feelings. “Like who raised you?”

“Who raised you?” Liam sounds genuinely curious.

“The people who pay your salary,” Niall reminds everyone present. “Y’all have to be nice to me.”

“I’m hungry.” Harry announces.

“Aww,” Niall coos and approaches the sad kitty, “Is poor meow meow hungry? Let friendly Irish gentlemen help.”

“Stay away from him,” Louis warns Harry about Niall who nods obediently, he would jump out the damn window if Louis commanded him to! (to land on his feet but that’s another point) “He’s a lush and a letch.”

“Okay what have I done to deserve this?” Niall demands to understand this treatment of him.

Louis points to the framed photograph on the hallway wall, depicting said Irishmen wearing nothing but a blanket, on his work desk, passed out. “This was last Monday.”

“I own the company.” Niall explains to Harry, who frowns. “I can do what I want.”

“Not yet,” Louis screams, “You can’t yet.”

“What are you talking about?” Harry asks, confused.

“Work,” Louis explains to cat, “Remember? That place where people go to make money?”

“Oh,” Harry is suitably surprised. “Why?”

“To buy things,” Liam says slowly, “Like food and clothing.”

Harry pouts a little. Humans are so weird.

“Maybe we can get you a job,” Louis says to Harry warmly, “Like modelling?” His kitten looks stunning in all his clothes.

“Just be careful.” Niall warns. “Don’t let anyone take advantage of him.” He gesture to where Harry has started batting around a large ball of yarn.

“Over my dead body,” Louis huffs. Nobody will ever touch his beautiful cat. Not even Louis.

“Are you dying?” Harry pauses in his playing. Humans die a lot on TV. Very fragile creatures.

“No sweetie,” Louis says from where he’s tending to his cooking, “It’s an expression.”

“Okay,” Harry has no idea what’s going on with stupid master.

“What a lovely smell Louis,” Liam says, impressed, “What is going on in there?” Usually Louis throws a bag of chips at their head.

“It’s a special recipe for Harry,” Louis says, “I picked it up online. It’s good for his nutrition.”

“You realize he only needs his drink to live,” Niall wags his eyebrows suggestively.

“Okay what the fuck is this drink,” Liam snaps as Louis blushes a deep red.

“We are also having a guest over.” Louis hisses, smiling a little when Harry hisses back.

“A guest,” Niall scoffs as Liam has a puzzled expression on his face. Louis is generally a lone wolf. Very antisocial and angry. Why would he associate with anyone other than present company?

“Yes,” Louis says, feeling a little defensive, “Is that a problem?”

“No,” Liam and Niall say together, frightened a little. “No problem.”

“Good,” Louis says, “Behave yourselves, he’s better than you.”

“Isn’t everyone better than Niall?” Liam asks tiredly.

“Oi,” Niall says, but nods a little. He’s a blessed degenerate, too good for this planet.

“I want master,” Harry yowls, and Louis runs into the living room with his arms open, “Why are you ignoring me?”

“No one is ignoring you,” Louis promises as Harry burrows his face in his chest, nuzzling. “I just can’t leave fire alone. You know that.”

“I will set myself on fire,” Harry warns.

“Bad kitten.” Louis says soothingly running his hands through perfect curls.

“Damn,” Liam is mesmerized at Harry’s tail wrapping around Louis’ waist. This is just a new level of kink he didn’t know existed.

“Money well spent,” Niall looks at his investment with deep pride and joy. Now, how can he sneak the spy camera he brought into Louis’ bedroom? As a gay porn fanatic, his private show is well on the road but Niall sugar baby bear needs to be able to watch it!

\----------

“My apologies for lateness,” Zayn says, his tone suggesting that he’s not sorry at all.

“Whatever,” Niall says, “Welcome to our lovely home.”

“Okay,” Zayn eyes the apron Niall has tied around his waist. “Thanks.”

“Shoo,” Louis chases Niall away with a broom, “And give me my apron back.” He says when the blond laughs and runs away. “Sorry about him.”

“Not a problem.” Zayn smiles, “Louis,” He offers a hand which is accepted with the hand not holding a broom.

“Louis, Niall is touching Harry and…” Liam pauses at the sight of Zayn. “H-Hello.”

“Hello,” Zayn smirks. He’s obviously used to this reaction.

“Behave,” Louis snaps at Liam who is flabbergasted at the level of cheekbone game on the inhuman.

“I-I have a fiancé!” Liam says, almost defense.

“That’s nice for you, dear,” Zayn hands Liam his coat, “Well done.”

“Oh lord this is a new development.” Niall says from where he’s caressing Harry’s abs. “I didn’t even plan this.”

“Harry,” Louis says, “What did I say about Niall touching you.”

“You won’t touch me.” Harry whimpers. “Someone should.”

“No one will ever touch you.” Louis reminds Harry. “You will die of blue balls.”

“Okay,” Zayn goes into work mode as soon as he enters the room, Liam still staring with a dropped jaw. “Bad. Bad Louis.”

“What?” Louis says, defensive.

“This cat has needs.” Zayn gestures to where Harry is growling at the enemy demon. “You can’t just ignore them.”

“I won’t take advantage of him.” Louis crosses his arms.

“It’s not taking advantage if he wants sex.” Zayn reminds Louis.

“He’s compelled to want it.” Louis counters, “He’s programmed that way. I won’t defile him.”

Niall seethes. He won’t ever get any porn this way. So what if he successfully managed to sneak a camera into Louis’ bedroom? It’s moot point. Sex is not happening.

Once again Louis Tomlinson has gotten in the way of a major orgasm.

“Cunt.” Niall barks at Louis who makes a surprised sound.

“Cunt,” Harry happily repeats.

“Bad word,” Louis says, “Bad word, kitten. See,” He turns to Zayn, “He’s got the mentality of a five year old.”

Harry mewls sadly. Master is paying more attention to this other demon than Harry. Why? What’s wrong with Harry? Is Harry not pretty enough? Why won’t master love him?

“You are hurting him mentally,” Zayn reminds Louis as the cat curls into himself, ignoring Niall who offers the ball of yarn. “You are breaking his heart.”

“That’s why you’re here.” Louis reminds angel looking demon. “Help us.”

“This is new for me.” Zayn says. “I honestly can’t with you,” He tells Louis who glares habitually.

“Oh Louis is a grade A cunt.” Niall says, basically disappointed in life. “He never puts out.”

“Shut up,” Louis snaps.

Liam is still speechless at Zayn.

“Okay,” Zayn sighs, “You can always get tatted up.”

That snaps Liam out of his haze. He starts laughing along with Niall.

“Our Louis? Tattoos?”

“Hey,” Louis says defensively, “I could.”

“Remember,” Liam laughs even harder, “Last year, Louis and I were going to get some, and then Louis jumped out the window, and then…”

“Hey, asshole,” Louis turns to Niall who is screaming with laughter, “You don’t have any either.”

“But I am a sex enthusiast.” Niall reminds everyone, “And I drink heavily.”

“That’s good to know,” Zayn tells Niall, and then turns to Louis, “It will help you bond with your demon, and free his soul from sexual servitude. His real personality will come out.”

Louis gives Harry a worried look. “Will it help him?”

“It will help free him.” Zayn nods. “People have tried it sometime. Usually for military rule.”

“What?” Liam says, interested and then blushes when Zayn looks at him.

“Well like wars,” Zayn shrugs, “Demons are created from a master’s blood, and then freed for fighting and shit. Not everyone wants a sex slave.”

“Thank you,” Louis says, and then frowns. “So you are saying Harry could be a sociopath.”

“Maybe,” Zayn replies, “It’s a demon, it could go either way. He could be nice.”

“He’s so sweet and docile,” Louis turns to where Harry is trying to unravel the ball of yarn. “I don’t want that to change.”

“He will keep trying to make a pass at you,” Zayn shakes his head, “And when he fails he will get super depressed and that’s even worse than whatever scenario your moral high compass has created in your head.” He sniffles delicately. “Is that food for me?”

“It’s not for us,” Niall says dryly.

“I don’t like eating alone,” Zayn turns to where Liam is staring unabashedly, and then smirks when the man sputters and blushes.

“Oh kitty,” Louis says to Harry who is meowing to himself. “I just want what’s best for you.”

 


	5. Chapter 5

“What is that?” Harry questions Louis, when they are on one of their shopping trips.

“Oh,” Louis says, “Okay, well, Harry, when a man and a woman love each other. They have a baby.”

“A Bay-Bee.” Harry questions the term with a thick accent, a cute frown on pretty face. “Explain.”

“Well,” Louis says, unable to control his fond, “Those two,” He gestures to the attractive couple seated on the bench next to them, “had a baby.”

“Can we have a bay-bee?” Of course that is Harry’s next question.

It’s only logical.

“No, sweetie.” Louis says, his fond and exasperation are tiresome. “We can’t.”

“Why not?” Harry looks agitated. “We can’t we have a bay-bee?”

The couple nearby is staring. They look amused. Their baby is staring. It’s fascinated by Harry, or more importantly his swaying tail.

“Well, luv,” Louis sobs a little because this is his life now. The cat whisperer. “Sweetums.”

The couple is deeply interested in what Louis is going to say next. Wankers.

“I want a bay-bee.”

“You can have this,” The couple readily offers their bundle of joy. They are tired of caring for it. Louis hopes they are joking in the spirit of the season.

“No thank you,” Harry says politely. “I want our baby.”

“We are men,” Louis responds, praying a little inside, “We can’t have babies.”

“You won’t have sex,” Harry snaps, “You won’t have babies. Just say it. It’s me.”

Many people are staring now. Louis sweats nervously.

“Just tell me you hate me,” Harry orders Louis. “Just release me from this lie.”

“I won’t take advantage of you.” Louis mutters.

“I will,” A beautiful twenty something girl offers breathlessly. Apparently Harry is her type.

“I’m sure you will.” Louis gives her his murder smile. Guarding Harry is a full time job. No benefits, no sick leave, just an endless level of satisfaction that nobody will violate beautiful cat.

“She likes me,” Harry smiles at girl, who looks ready to faint.

“She can go away now,” Louis glares at pretty girl. People of all ages are having a reaction to his feline. Well enough is enough. This is Louis’ cat.

“So,” Harry frowns, he does that a lot, “You want me to be alone, all the time?”

“No, babe.” Louis says patiently, “I want everything to be your choice.”

“My choice is sex.” Harry screams, “Sex, sex, sex.”

“But the moral implications…”

“Oh screw morality.” Harry looks ready to hit Louis which is fine. Violence over sex.

“Babe,” Louis says as people shake their head at the abusive cat owner. “We have an appointment with that special tattoo artist today.”

“I want to have a baby.” Harry snaps. He is irritated and fragile.

“Why don’t we buy you more clothes?” Louis says, his tone full of love.

“I don’t like any of this stuff,” Harry sulks a little. He is a very expensive cat. Mall clothes won’t satisfy his fancy needs.

Louis wishes this was a female cat so he could impregnate her and give her a damn baby to keep her busy. “Oh god.”

“I am leaving and never coming back!” Harry announces, miserable.

“No,” Louis begs and the honesty in his voice scares him a little. “Please don’t leave me Harry.”

“You don’t want me,” Harry pouts and his deep, melodious voice trembles a little.

“This is so hot,” a college aged girl whimpers a little nearby.

“I am so wet.” Her friend giggles a little. “We should totally get that vibrator.”

“But it’s not on sale!” Her worldly friend chastises.

“I just want to protect you,” Louis implores Harry to understand. “Why don’t you get it?”

“Why don’t you just lock me up?” Harry’s tail bristles. He is mad upset. “Get a cage made? No one can get in or out?”

 _Can this get any hotter?_ The married couple think together. Their child is mesmerized. It reaches for Harry’s tail but fails. It’s too small. It has no hand eye coordination.

“Tell you what,” Louis grabs a cat paw, “After we get those tattoos, you can do whatever you want, no questions asked.”

“Really?” Harry looks sceptical.

“Of course.” Louis promises, “I want you to have a fulfilling cat life.”

“Okay,” Harry sniffles. “I will do whatever I want after the stupid tattoos.”

“That’s a good kitten,” Louis coos. “Who’s my good kitten?”

“I am,” A bouncy co-ed squeals. Harry hisses at her.

\----------

“Hi I am your tattoo artist,” The person from modest management looking to perform their body art looks as if her soul has left her body. “I have taken a vow to make sure all techniques are sterile and law abiding.”

“Thank you?” Louis answers for both himself and Harry who looks enamoured by all the drawings on the wall.

“How may I help you?” The dull looking woman asks dully.

“Well,” Louis takes charge, “I want my Harry here to make more decisions for himself.”

“Oh,” The woman’s eyes widen with surprise. She looks interested all of a sudden. “Okay then. Usually it’s the other way around.”

“I’m sure it is.” Louis says dryly. He’s been looking through websites to make sure he can provide good care for his cat and the stuff online is disgusting. Demon owners only seem interested in degrading and hurting their felines/canines/etc. No freedom allowed whatsoever.

“Well,” The tattoo artist makes Harry sit down and has him take off his shirt, “His tattoos were created with a special ink.”

“Which has my blood in it.” Louis nods. That much he knows.

The artist nods. “And to have him be freer and to deepen your bond, you need to have tattoos which has Harry’s blood.”

“Fine,” Louis is fed up. He has to go back to work soon, and Harry’s complaining and whining and general sadness is starting to grate on his damn nerves. How long is Louis supposed to control himself around the beautiful cat? He’s supposed to be straight damn it.

“Modest management’s official statement advices against this.” The girl looks amazed at Louis’ behaviour and caring attitude. The guy is bristling protectively as she draws Harry’s blood who barely notices. It’s a demon. He heals instantaneously. “I think you’re great.” She whispers, as if afraid someone might hear.

“Yeah okay,” Louis says, annoyed at his awful morality. “What about Harry’s personality? I don’t want my kitten to change.”

“That I cannot guarantee,” There is a sad sigh from the girl because Harry truly is a perfectly sweet cat. “He might make a complete three-sixty.”

“I just want him to be free.” Louis’ eyes get all steely. “Do it,” He orders the girl, who nods and complies.

\----------

“So,” Louis asks Harry who stares back, “How do you feel?”

“Bored,” Harry wraps his tail around Louis, “Can we watch something?”

“Sure,” Louis is feeling pretty… okay considering he just went against his generally vanilla lifestyle. He’s shacking up with a dude, all tatted up. What’s next?

“I want hugs,” Harry demands and Louis lets out a breath he was holding all the way home. He wants his beautiful baby boy to stay the same. God knows Harry is precious and Louis won’t change that for the world.

“Come here perfect kitten,” Louis opens up his arms and lets Harry cuddle up close. “My favourite angel.”

“Can we watch something fun?”

“Whatever my princess cat wants.” Louis promises. He’s high with joy right now. So high that he doesn’t notice Harry undressing, or ordering pay-per-view gay porn. Seriously, teaching Harry how to work the damn remote is the worst thing Louis’ ever done.

“Okay so,” Harry narrows his eyes at the screen, “Why do they call it doggy style? Does that mean I can’t do that?”

“Mhmm,” Louis smiles a little and closes his eyes, but then startles fully awake. What is cat talking about?

“It should be called kitten style,” Harry is appalled at the terminology use. “I can do that too.”

“Oh god,” Louis finds a surge of adrenaline despite his exhausting day and lunges for the remote, “For god’s sake Harry!”

“I just wanted to learn,” Harry lets out a growl. An uncharacteristic growl. A manly growl. A sound his kitten has never made before.

“O-Okay,” Louis tries to placate the cat, “Sweetheart, a little too much for light viewing innit?”

“Never mind then,” Harry sounds really upset. He grabs his pillow and leaves the room, silk boxers and all.

“Oh fuck.” Louis grabs his cellphone and dials Zayn’s number. “Oh fucking fuck.”

\----------

“It has been brought to my attention that I have been unfair to you.” Louis says, feeling deeply odd in the guest room bedroom door.

“I don’t care,” Harry shrugs, staring at some random episode of a show where they make fun of people for dressing poorly.

“It has never been my intention to hurt you in any way.” Louis offers and he feels he has said this one too many times. “I wish you would understand that.”

“I know you don’t like me.” Harry sniffles a little. “Not in that way.”

“This situation is a little too weird for me,” Louis crawls in beside Harry, aware of the sting of his own body, of the art suddenly decorating his flesh. “I don’t like how vulnerable you are.”

“I’m not.” Harry reminds Louis. “I’m strong and you’ve got all those tattoos. They look nice.”

“I feel silly,” Louis laughs.

“I want to lick them.” Harry’s pupils are vertical slit and that should not be so hot. It really shouldn’t but Louis’ body reacts strongly. “I want to eat you.”

“Don’t.” Louis blushes a little.

“Look,” Harry sighs, “Let me doggy style it once and if you don’t like it, we never have to do it again.”

“It’s not as simple as that, Harry.” Louis’ face feels as it will explode. If only his major high school girlfriend could hear it now. Hell, if only all his exes could hear it now. They would have a field day. _Didn’t I tell you? He’s a poof!_ “This is a major lifestyle choice, damn it.”

“You promised we could do anything once you had tattoos, and I will be careful.” Harry grabs the lotion from the bedside drawer. “My hockey stick is bigger than the ones in the video.”

It takes Louis a good long minute to realize Harry is talking about his penis because that’s what one hockey themed porno called cocks, and by that time his demon is already getting ready to bang.

\----------

“No,” Niall screams at his computer screen, “No. Fucking fuck. Noooooo!”

“Niall,” Victoria’s Secret’s latest star, (she just won the fantasy bra), giggles at the hysterical outburst, “Are you quite ready?”

“Are you out of your mind, woman?” Niall whimpers at the banging sounds coming from the video feed but no visuals because the cunts have moved to another room. _Are they on to me?_ Niall desperately wonders as the perfect woman in his company starts placing kisses up and down his neck.

“I am horny,” The goddess announces.

“My balls are blue.” Niall announces, full of hate. Louis Tomlinson once again has shat all over an expensive investment.

“I will be waiting when you are done being a creep.” The clicking of heels recedes toward Niall’s bedroom.

“Why,” Niall sobs as the banging gets louder, and so do the orgasmic moans. “Why would you do this to me? I’m your ride or die bitch and you know it.”

\----------


End file.
